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Go Back   Community > Society > My God Can Beat the Shit Out of Your God

My God Can Beat the Shit Out of Your God For discussing any and all religious viewpoints. Intolerance will not be tolerated. Keeping your sense of humor is required. Posting messages about theological paradoxes is encouraged.

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  #1   Add ATypiCalStuDenT to your ignore list  
Old 2003-07-17, 01:52
ATypiCalStuDenT ATypiCalStuDenT is offline
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Proofs that Jesus was...

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS JEWISH:

1. He went into his father's business

2. He lived at home until the age of 33

3. He was sure his mother was a virgin, and his mother was sure he was God

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS Irish:

1. He never got married.

2. He never held a steady job

3. His last request was a drink

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS PUERTO RICAN:

1.His first name was Jesus

2.He was always in trouble with the law

3.His mother did not know who his father was

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS ITALIAN:

1. He talked with his hands

2. He had wine with every meal

3. He worked in the building trades

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS BLACK:

1. He called everybody brother

2. He had no permanent address

3. Nobody would hire him

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS CALIFORNIAN:

1. He never cut his hair

2. He walked around barefoot

3. He invented a new religion

  #2   Add liam to your ignore list  
Old 2003-07-17, 04:47
liam liam is offline
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you are going to get flamed badly haha
  #3   Add SublimeZen124 to your ignore list  
Old 2003-07-17, 05:08
SublimeZen124 SublimeZen124 is offline
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The land of the blue light.
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All I want to say about that is: Man... you are a king amoung men for figuring all of that stuff out. Oh yeah, Jesus was a hippy because 1.He never cut his hair. 2.He never wore shoes. 3.He had no permanent adress, but I guess that is just a combination of some others.
  #4   Add OsirisGuy429 to your ignore list  
Old 2003-07-17, 06:40
OsirisGuy429 OsirisGuy429 is offline
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Jesus was a huge pothead... besides the sandles and all that, he comes from a land that, especially back then was rich in marijuana plants and opium. Jesus walkin on water? Noooo... his disciples were stoned. Not that i don't believe in God or anything I do, but most things he did was drug related. The bible even tells of someone doing drugs and i don't think it was an anti-drug story either... but don't quote me on that.

HAHA as i'm writing about Jesus smokin the ganja i look to my right and see an ad for the hemp store
  #5   Add ATypiCalStuDenT to your ignore list  
Old 2003-07-17, 11:57
ATypiCalStuDenT ATypiCalStuDenT is offline
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And you know... Jesus didnt die and rise from the dead.,..

Him and his mates went to a wedding, and got so drunk and so stoned, that Jesus went walkabout that night, and when he passed out he didnt get up for 3 days!! LMAO

Bring on the flames!!!!!!
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