Atheists Creed....

[inquisitor_11]

Something you might like... ive been doin a lot of reading lately, hence all the plagerism. Anyway

The Creed, by Steve Turner

We believe in Marxfreudanddarwin

We believe everything is OK

as long as you don't hurt anyone,

to the best of your definition of hurt,

and to the best of your knowledge.

We believe in sex before, during and after marriage.

We believe in the therapy of sin.

We believe that adultery is fun.

We believe sodomy's OK

We believe that taboos are taboo.

We believe everything's getting better

despite evidence to the contrary.

The evidence must be investigated.

You can prove anything with evidence.

We believe ther's something in horoscopes,

UFO's and bent spoons;

Jesus was a good man just like Buddha

Mohammed and ourselves.

He was a good moral teacher although we think his good morals were bad.

We believe all religions are basically the same,

at least the one we read was.

They all believe in love and goodness.

They only differ on matters of

creation sin heaven hell God and salvation

We believe that after death comes The Nothing

because when you ask the dead what happens

they say Nothing.

If death is not the end, if the dead have lied,

then it's compulsory heaven for all

excepting perhaps Hitler, Stalin and Genghis Khan.

We believe in Masters and Johnson.

What's selected is average.

What's average is normal.

What's normal is good.

We believe in total disarmament.

We believe there are direct links between warfare and bloodshed.

Americans should beat their guns into tractors and the Russian would be sure to follow.

We believe that man is essentially good.

It's only his behaviour that let's him down.

This is the fault of society.

Society is the fault of conditions.

Conditions are the fault of society

We believe that each man must find the truth that is right for him.

Reality will adapt accordingly. The universe will readjust. History will alter.

We believe that there is no absolute truth

excepting the truth that there is no absolute truth.

We believe in the rejection of creeds.

[Craftian]

quote:Originally posted by inquisitor_11:

We believe in Marx

Hardly. Nothing about atheism dictates Marxism.

quote:freudanddarwin

Freud, whatever.

Darwin, what's not to believe?

quote:We believe everything is OK

as long as you don't hurt anyone,

to the best of your definition of hurt,

and to the best of your knowledge.

The problem with this being?

quote:We believe in sex before, during and after marriage.

Yep.

quote:We believe in the therapy of sin.

Sin only exists for people who believe in gods.

quote:We believe that adultery is fun.

We believe sodomy's OK

They aren't?

quote:We believe that taboos are taboo.

We also believe blue is blue. Pretty crazy, eh?

quote:We believe everything's getting better

despite evidence to the contrary.

I disagree entirely. Nothing about atheism dictates optimism.

quote:The evidence must be investigated.

You can prove anything with evidence.

Of course the evidence must be investigated, unless you'd rather have us guess at the answers.

Name something real you can't prove with evidence.

quote:We believe ther's something in horoscopes,

UFO's and bent spoons;

Hardly, I'd say most atheists are more skeptical than the general population if anything.

quote:Jesus was a good man just like Buddha

Mohammed and ourselves.

He was a good moral teacher although we think his good morals were bad.

I can't say whether Jesus was a good man or not; I've never met the fellow. Besides, it's not particularly relevant whether a Jewish carpenter who died 2000 years ago (and may never have lived at all) was good or not.

I'm fine with (most of) the morals the Bible claims he preaeched. The comment about good morals being bad makes no sense whatsoever.

quote:We believe all religions are basically the same,

at least the one we read was.

They're all the same in the single most important way; amount of evidence for their claims. Besides, how could this possibly be worse than believing your religion is different from everybody else's, despite the fact that you've never investigated them.

quote:They all believe in love and goodness.

They only differ on matters of

creation sin heaven hell God and salvation

That's absurd. There are plenty of religions that don't believe in any of these things.

quote:We believe that after death comes The Nothing

because when you ask the dead what happens

they say Nothing.

This is worse than assuming something does come after death, despite the fact that dead say nothing and the activity in their brains that allows them to say things is ended?

quote:If death is not the end, if the dead have lied,

then it's compulsory heaven for all

excepting perhaps Hitler, Stalin and Genghis Khan.

No idea where this comes from. If death isn't the end, I have no idea what it is.

quote:We believe in Masters and Johnson.

What's selected is average.

What's average is normal.

What's normal is good.

Who are Masters and Johnson?

The rest of this doesn't make much sense.

quote:We believe in total disarmament.

Atheists believe all kinds of things, there are plenty who are pro-war.

quote:We believe there are direct links between warfare and bloodshed.

...there isn't?

quote:Americans should beat their guns into tractors and the Russian would be sure to follow.

A bit dated, I see.

quote:We believe that man is essentially good.

It's only his behaviour that let's him down.

This is the fault of society.

Society is the fault of conditions.

Conditions are the fault of society

I'd agree that conditions and society depend upon each other. It's a vicious cycle. They are not the only factors, however.

quote:We believe that each man must find the truth that is right for him.

I'd prefer they find the truth that is true.

quote:Reality will adapt accordingly. The universe will readjust. History will alter.

Hah, unlikely.

quote:We believe in the rejection of creeds.

What is there to particularly like about dogma?

[Hexadecimal]

I'm an atheist by most means, so I'll respond.

"We believe in Marxfreudanddarwin

We believe everything is OK

as long as you don't hurt anyone,

to the best of your definition of hurt,

and to the best of your knowledge."

Marx was a fool, and Freud was a latent queer. I most definitely think Darwin was intelligent, and his original idea has expounded greatly and spawned a theory. Also, everything would suck if we didn't hurt people, there'd be no bad to compare the good too. If their writing was supposed to be intelligent criticism, I find it lacking in intelligence and accuracy.

"We believe in sex before, during and after marriage.

We believe in the therapy of sin.

We believe that adultery is fun.

We believe sodomy's OK

We believe that taboos are taboo."

It's not that I think they're okay, it's that it's none of my fucking business what other people do with themselves and their relationships. People want to kill themselves, go ahead. People want to fuck their gay partner, go ahead. People want to cheat on their saimese, crippled, gay partner with three women, go ahead, that's their business, not mine.

"We believe everything's getting better

despite evidence to the contrary.

The evidence must be investigated.

You can prove anything with evidence."

I don't really think there's a good or a bad way for society to go except surival and extinction. We're surviving quite well, so we're doing okay there. As to whether we're lovey dovey and boring as all hell, I'm GLAD we're not peaceful. True peace would suck. No conflict=no spice of life.

"We believe ther's something in horoscopes,

UFO's and bent spoons;

Jesus was a good man just like Buddha

Mohammed and ourselves.

He was a good moral teacher although we think his good morals were bad."

I know very few atheists, but plenty of Christians, Jews, and Pagans that are very superstitious and heavily into horoscopes. From the accounts of Jesus, he was a good guy; rather than turning away the sick and the whores, he helped them out. However, being a good person doesn't make you the son of a God whose existence is heavily questionable.

"We believe all religions are basically the same,

at least the one we read was.

They all believe in love and goodness.

They only differ on matters of

creation sin heaven hell God and salvation"

This isn't even intelligent mockery right here. The atheists that are such due to logical conclusions rather than rebellion most likely will study multiple religions and see what they're about. It's the ignorant little shits who claim atheism to be psuedo-logical that know nothing about religions.

"We believe that after death comes The Nothing

because when you ask the dead what happens

they say Nothing.

If death is not the end, if the dead have lied,

then it's compulsory heaven for all

excepting perhaps Hitler, Stalin and Genghis Khan."

Atheism just means one doesn't believe in God, or believes no God can or has existed. Atheists can still believe in afterlives, or whatever nonsense...most tend not to...but atheism breaks down to a-without, and theism-belief in a system of god(s). Atheism-Without a belief in a system of god(s), or the existence of god(s). Quite simple, isn't it?

"We believe in Masters and Johnson.

What's selected is average.

What's average is normal.

What's normal is good."

Wee, more rambling from inaccurate and poorly developed grade-school level poetry.

"We believe in total disarmament.

We believe there are direct links between warfare and bloodshed.

Americans should beat their guns into tractors and the Russian would be sure to follow."

I'm in favor of a nice mix of war and peace, and I'm most definitely pro-gun.

"We believe that man is essentially good.

It's only his behaviour that let's him down.

This is the fault of society.

Society is the fault of conditions.

Conditions are the fault of society"

MAn is essentially primal, and only good in the sense that he will attempt to survive in absolutely all conditions presented, further enhancing his primal instincts and abilities...otherwise we're essentially 'evil' by most people's definitions of the word.

"We believe that each man must find the truth that is right for him.

Reality will adapt accordingly. The universe will readjust. History will alter.

We believe that there is no absolute truth

excepting the truth that there is no absolute truth."

Who the fuck DOESN'T believe each man should find the truth themselves? Are we supposed to be fed the 'truth' rather than see if what we're told makes any fucking sense?

"We believe in the rejection of creeds."

I believe in the rejection of poorly written crap, and this most definitely is. I'm going to suck on fumes and hope it wipes my short term memory clean of this excrement.

[SurahAhriman]

Out of the night that covers me,

black as the pit from pole to pole.

I thank whatever gods may be

for my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

my head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears,

looms but the horror of the shade,

and yet the menace of the years finds,

and shall find me, unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

how charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate;

I am the captain of my soul.



"Invictus,"

by William Earnest Henley



I like this better as an "atheists creed".

[inquisitor_11]

Yes that was actually a mistake on my part - it was published under the title "creed" not "atheists creed".