I'm a fucked up person, I have had a messed up experience of life. I grew up in the upper midwest where all of my family believed strongly in a particular breed of christianity that is unbelievably closed minded. I have traveled all over the world thailand, mexico, india on two occasions, and now china. I don't know what to do spiritually, I know this is pathetic asking an internet forum what to do,but I am really out of options, I have asked friends, and everyone else, I have a serious alcohol problem. I know it stems from a lack of something in my life, and I don't know what accept for religion. I have been considering a conversion to islam here in beijing, but that is difficult. I really am intrigued by hinduism, but I know from experience that westerners cannot really ever convert to hinduism. I think my love of islam might just come from a lasting anger toward everything that my home ideas come from, I don't know what to do, but I know that I want to find something soon, or I will die of misery, and booze.
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