To be Confirmed or not to be?

[zEsTyTuRtLe]

I'm an atheist who goes to a Catholic School and although I hate to say it I am popular and I don't mean that in a snobby way I mean people enjoy being with me and they normally make sure that whatever they do is ok with me(that actually kind of scares me). WEll, since I am in the 8th grade I am supposed to be confirmed and I odn't know if I should be or not.By being confirmed I am going against everything I have ever said about the Catholic Church and it makes me look very superficial and fickle.And by not being confirmed(God I'm gonna sound like such a superficial freak and i hate it)I'm setting myself apart from my classmates and I'm afraid that I will lose their respect and worst of all I'm afraid I will lose their friendship[ and I know taht if they were my true friends they wouldn't care but that is just not a chance I am really willing to take and the one thing I am most afraid of is being alone...that is a thought that has always haunted ME. And just to let you know I don't change my personality so taht people will like me I'm just an upbeat person that a lot of people enjoy being with and some who don't like em because they think that I am to in their face but that's ok.Also, it's not tat I really care what people think about me it's jsut I like being liked and when peopel don't want to talk to me because my religious faith or my lack of religious faith it seems kind of stupid and the thought of people hating me really scares me and makes me sad.



Flame at will

[Lysergamideman]

You have a very distorted outlook on your system of values/beliefs and that of others.

You need to stop & take a look at everthing from an outside perspective. That is the only way to even attempt to understand why people interact with you the way they do. And the best way to unerstand yourself.

[SurahAhriman]

At your age I'd be more worried about what your parents are going to say. And if they're hardline enough to make you go to Catholic School, then you'll probably be anywhere from disowned to grounded. As for what people think of you.... fuck 'em. Any jackass dogmatic enough to stop being friends with you just because you have different beliefs isn't worth having as a friend. And there are other considerations. Is confirmation a requirement of graduation? What would your parents say? I think those are the most important questions. Reply with that, and I'll give advice from there.

[zEsTyTuRtLe]

My parents would probably be very disappointed and so would my grandfather because I just told him he could be my sponser

It is not required of me to be confirmed but I have to do all of the same activities whether I'm confirmed or not.

I am confirmed, and i would not suggest being confirmed because it would make you a hypocrite. and if your parents bitch well tough cuz better to be unconfirmed than be a hypocrite. If your "friends" leave you because you aren't confirmed fuck them they suck. but think of the future, how do you know you might believe in God later? whatever, I wouldn't do it.

[SurahAhriman]

Do what you gotta do. If you really believe there is no God, then it doesn't mean anything. But if you really believe that there is something fundamentally wrong with Christianity, then don't do it. Try to explain to your parents why you don't want to, but use mature arguements. And don't try to explain why you think there is no God unless one of them forces the issue.

[zEsTyTuRtLe]

It's not that I have something against Christianity I mean if you want to believe in God by all means do so especially if it gives you something to believe and it makes you happy. It's just that since I go to a Catholic school I get all of that bullshit forced upon me and so it's the Catholic religion taht I am so much against because I think just about everything in there religion is bullshit.Andsince I've told my grandfather he can be my sponser and I'm not sure how I can break it to him that I'm not going to be confirmed because he's one of those like hard core catholics who goes to church every sunday whether he's sick or not goes on wednesday and all that other stuff so I guess I'm kind of stuck because I don't really want to break my grandfather's heart because my mom says that he has been looking forward to this forever and the fact that my older brother didn't choose him as his sponser hurt him and now that he's mine it made him so happy.So yeah I guess there isn't much else I can do.

[This message has been edited by zEsTyTuRtLe (edited 02-01-2004).]

[Craftian]

While standing up for your principles is generally a good thing, it would probably be better to just do it and not kick up a fuss. No need to spoil your relationship with your family and friends over something like this.

[SurahAhriman]

I agree with craftian. Standing up for what you believe is noble, but going through with a pointless ceremony for the sake of another is more so.

[siodojo]

hey if religion does'nt mean that much to you i'd say go for it. just remember once you get confirmed there's no way out, unless you switch religions, but i dunno i think your still confirmed. i dunno it's all b.s anyway.