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Gremlins 2: Rewritten III \ Here They Grow Again







Gremlins 2: Rewritten III \ Here They Grow Again

Written 1-1-93 by: David Minter

Based on the movie Gremlins 2 @1990 by Warner Brothers
Pictures Incorporated, the concept of the Book and Record
Set @1984 by Buena Vista Records, and material from
Gremlins 2: Rewritten \ Movin' On Up to the East Side
@1992 by David Minter and Gremlins 2: Rewritten II \ The
Legacy of Billy Peltzer @1992 by David Minter.



( Reveille plays in background. ) Hi everybody. This...
is... Duke. And... this... is... the... story... of...
Gremlins 2: Rewritten III \ Here They Grow Again. You can
read along with me in your book. You'll it's time to turn
the page when you hear the Road Runner beep like this
BEEP! BEEP! Let's begin... now. Remember to turn the
page every time you hear the Road Runner. BEEP! BEEP!



Billy stared on in horror as he immediately
recognized the strange balls of fluff. "Mogwai!" he
shouted loudly and longly into the heavens. "Yes?" came
the voice of Billy's secretary, Mrs. Maude Wye. Billy
shut off his intercom and turned towards his fallen
guards. They were screaming out in pain as the Mogwai
ripped through their throats. It was all that Billy could
muster to keep the expanse of creatures from rushing his
desk and attacking him. "So, yet again I must rise to the
occasion and defeat the Gremlins? SO BE IT!" With a
fervor unlike that ever seen in a corporate office, Billy
attacked the Mogwai. Images of Christmas past filled his
mind. Grabbing Mogwai after Mogwai from the top of his
desk, he ripped their heads off one by one! A few tried
to make a feeble attempt at escape, but to no avail. Billy
closed the doors electronically on several Mogwai. The
others were soon routed. With the blood of his fresh kill
upon his hands, he raised his fists to Heaven and shouted,
"Do you see this Rand? Am I the man you always wished I
would be? Can you now see that I can in fact defend
myself inside a mall as well as outside it?" BEEP! BEEP!









He lowered his hands and stared at the blood stained
palms. Tears of joy ran down his cheeks. "What has
happened to Christmas? It's become so commercial. Why
can't it ever be like this, hands stained with the blood
of your Christmas gifts?" He buried his face in his
bloodied hands. As he was sobbing, he contemplated the
return of the Mogwai. Then, it struck him! Removing his
face, he turned to face the window. Seeing nothing, he
wiped the blood from his eyes. Although he still couldn't
see anything, he could now see that nothing much clearer.
It could only mean one thing. "Ohmigod! It's after
midnight!" He looked at the solid gold clock on his desk.
Sure enough, it was 12:05 A.M. eastern standard time, and
of course New York is on eastern standard time. BEEP!
BEEP!

Billy rushed over to his intercom. "Mrs. Wye! Close
Obsidian's immediately. I repeat... CLOSE OBSIDIAN'S
IMMEDIATELY!" Mrs. Wye put down her nail file and rang up
Jerry. Billy waited impatiently for the return call.
Finally... "Okay, Mr. Peltzer. It's been done."
"Excellent." "Hold on, sir. Ghostbusters! Yes... we're
back!" "Mrs. Wye. Hang up on that call and hold all
others, bitch!" Although she hated to be sweared at in
such a manner, she was in fact a bitch and had to do her
bitchy job. Billy quickly put on his jacket and ran out
the door. As he did so, he bumped into John Astin. "Hey,
Billmeister!" "No time!" he shouted, not realizing that
the person he hated most in the building was back. He ran
on his mad way. John just shrugged his shoulders and
stepped into Billy's office. What he saw sickened him.
"Yuck! What is all this? Blood and various parts of
furry animals litter the room! To think, I can't get out
of my contract until I complete one last day's work. Oh,
well. Hmmmm. I forgot my mop. I'll get rid of the
corpses first." Scooping up the parts into his trash can,
he walked over to the incinerator and dumped the refuse
down it! BEEP! BEEP!

Down in the research and development crucible, Dr.
Wily, with a heavy heart, was stilling conducting
experiments on the few remaining Mogwai. His conscience
was burdened by guilt. HE was responsible for this
situation, and he couldn't do anything about it. So, he
might as well try to get his Nobel Prize. Something
interesting was happening in the containment unit. Shortly
after midnight, he had noticed that all the Mogwai, except
for the first one he had caught, suddenly attacked the
corned beef that had been left in the unit with them.
BEEP! BEEP!









Upstairs at Obsidian's, Billy was standing guard at
the entrance, making sure that no tried to re-enter the
restaurant after being forcibly ejected from the
establishment. Several patrons, still wearing lobster
bibs and clutching silverware, tried to persuade him to
let them back in. No amount of money could sway him. So
when they saw that all their work was for naught, they
decided to recoup their loses by pocketing the silverware
and heading home. Billy had a job to do and he was going
to make damn sure that he did in fact do it. He had
placed a call to Ronald X. Chump and informed him of the
situation. He had requested men in radiation suits to
pour radioactive isotopes into the corned beef in the
building so that when the Mogwai decided to change, they
would die. So, Billy had to guard the only source of
corned beef in the building, Obsidian's, from a Gremlin
invasion until that help arrived. Unfortunately, his work
was futile as he looked across the mall and saw the new
item on McChump's menu... the McCorned Beef sandwich.
BEEP! BEEP!

A mad crowd of idiots dashed out of McChump's
followed by an even madder crowd of Gremlins! Billy was
thrown to the ground by a Gremlin jumping onto his chest.
With its mighty claws, it swiped across Billy's chest,
writing, "Walk, don't run, to the nearest exit!" Billy
threw the creature off his chest and stared at his jacket.
"That's my new acid proof jacket you just defiled!"
Angrily rushing the Gremlin, he grabbed it by the throat
and smashed its skull against the window. Billy stood and
surveyed the scene. His once serene profit making
industry had become a sanitarium. Gremlins rushed about
here and there, smashing windows, upsetting displays, and
looking everywhere for just one single container of Icy
Hot. Once paying people were now running around the
stores looking for the nearest exit. He was gonna need
some help on this one. BEEP! BEEP!

Outside, the heap that used to be Rand Peltzer
stirred. Falling from the top story of a huge building
would have killed a normal man. But, Rand is not a normal
man, nor are any of his family or friends. His inventions
proved that. As a matter of fact, one of his most recent
inventions saved him. Falling through space at 32 feet
per second per second, Rand was close to panic. But like
all good inventors, he kept his wits about him. Unlike
all good inventors, Rand didn't think clearly, just
quickly. Thinking quickly, Rand reached into his pocket
and pulled out a little capsule. Before he could figure
out what he had, the force of gravity yanked it out of his
hand. It was falling faster than Rand, and as such struck
the cement first. Upon hitting the ground, the capsule








expanded to form a bed of spikes. "Of course! My
encapsulated bed of spikes, activated by vibration. I
should have- UROOOFF!" That was the moment when Rand hit
the ground. Well, to be more exact, Rand hit the bed of
spikes. BEEP! BEEP!

Shortly thereafter, after recovering from the loss of
blood, Rand stirred and looked at his hole-filled body. He
even put his fingers through some of them just to make
sure. Yep, they were in fact there, and not just a
figment of an imagination suffering from the pain of
landing on a bed of spikes. Through his hazy pain, Rand
saw his mission. "I've got to go back inside and take
Mister Futterman's place in the movie!" Coughing up
blood, Rand headed back inside, trailing blood from his
various open wounds behind him. BEEP! BEEP!

Down in the basement, things had gone really insane,
and Dr. Wily was rapidly approaching the same plateau.
Moments ago, there had been a few Mogwai chowing down on
corned beef. Now, there were several poodle shaped pods
and the original creature ( He could tell it was the first
one he found by the scorch mark across its chest. ). He
continued to make observations, as any good scientist
should. He watched with keen interest as the poodles
began to crack and bubble. Green smoke hissed into the
room and mucus oozed out from the cracks. With a final
upheaval, the pods burst open! Dr. Wily waited with
anxious anticipation as to what these pupae had
metamorphosed into. Peering intently through the green
mist, he could make out absolutely nothing, as he did on
several dates in high school. He jumped back when a
strange, scaly, green, reptilian creature hurled itself at
the window. BEEP! BEEP!

Momentarily stunned ( unlike Rand I, though ), the
creature shook its head. That was when Dr. Wily saw its
teeth. Upon seeing Dr. Wily, the creature scraped its
claws against the glass. Dr. Wily covered his ears at the
screeching noise. Four other Gremlins joined their
comrade. Together, they pooled their resources together
and dashed at the window. After several painful tries,
the creatures finally burst through! The green smoke
poured into the main lab. Its stench was so overpowering
that Dr. Wily had to step back. The Gremlins leapt into
the room and to freedom. They ran up to a rack of test
tubes. One Gremlin took one and ate it. It had such an
odd taste and made such a strange sensation in his mouth
that he just had to share them with his friends.
Absconding away with the whole rack, the Gremlin joined
the others in their revolution and made good their escape.








BEEP! BEEP!

After Dr. Wily's head cleared, he noticed that his
rack of test tubes, which contained his gene altering
mutating agents, had been purloined. Stepping over Dr.
Ranjed's body, he took stock of what was missing. "The
spider gene, the flight gene, and the electric conduit
gene are all missing! Arte, did you get all that?" Dr.
Wily turned to the camera mounted on the ceiling. Arte
Johnson, up in the security section, peered closely at the
screen that showed the activity in Dr. Wily's lab. After
several seconds of intense observation, a Gremlin burst
through the glass and bit him on the face. As gravity
forced the creature to the floor, his teeth continued to
dig into the flesh on Arte's face. When the Gremlin
finally did reach the floor, Arte Johnson's face was in
its mouth. With his facial muscles and nerves exposed to
the air, Johnson screamed, increasing the pain even more.
He fell forward, splattering the control panel with blood,
nerves, teeth, and the few remnants of flesh left on his
face. First eating the face and then drinking the blood
and eating the brains, the Gremlin laughed loudly and
walked off. BEEP! BEEP!

Dr. Wily turned to the broken glass in the viewing
panel and stared evilly at Groucho. Before the Mogwai
could make his own escape, Dr. Wily reached through the
glass and snatched the creature. Pulling it through the
window into the lab, but not before cutting it on the
sharp shards of the remaining glass, he stared into its
face. Having been beaten and mistreated so severely,
Groucho was too weak to incorporate his mind control
abilities. Dr. Wily shook the Mogwai violently. "This is
all your fault!" he shouted into its face. "If you
hadn't come along, I wouldn't have become so greedy to
prove my point and get the Nobel Prize! Well, I'll show
you. I'll show you all!" Grabbing one of his notebooks
and clutching it and the Mogwai to his chest, Dr. Wily
stomped off up the staircase leading up to the Vice
President's office. BEEP! BEEP!

Meanwhile, in her soon to be temporary apartment,
Kate had changed out of her mini and into something less
sexy, but far more decent. She had just whipped up some
hot coffee and was sitting down on the couch in front of
the TV to enjoy a nice night of CCN. Lately, its new line
of programming had become her favorite. As if she really
had a choice. Just recently, Billy had only CCN installed
on their cable receiver. Her favorite show was "Don't You
Believe Him," a Cops/Car 54 dramedy. It stars a
character that Billy supposedly "created" ( much like Adam








West had "created" Bandu. ). BEEP! BEEP!

The show deals with the exploits of Lt. Harry
Worthlesston and his daily funny beat on the streets of
New York. Tonight's episode was just beginning. Harry
was driving around aimlessly, as he always did when on his
beat. Suddenly, he spotted a black man leaning against a
lamp post, doing absolutely nothing. Harry stopped, got
out, drew his revolver, and pointed it at the black man.
He ordered him to lie face first on the ground, hands
behind his head. The black man did exactly as he was
told, saying, "I haven't done anything, man!" Harry ran
up to him, a slightly difficult task considering his
weight problem, and shot the man in the back of both
shins! "That's to make sure you don't try to escape!" he
shouted in his trying-to-be-tough police mannerism. He
went through the man's pockets, took his wallet and shirt
for evidence, and then cuffed his hands behind his back,
ala Rand I. Finally, Harry rolled the black man over
until his head was under the front tire of his car. He
got back in his car and drove over the man's head, leaving
a trail of blood and organs along the way. As Harry drove
away, other on duty cops patrolling beats on foot noticed
what Harry had done, but just ignored it to continue
beating innocent civilians. As Harry drove away, the
camera gets a close up of the back of his head. He turns
to face the camera, still driving, and points at it,
saying, "Don't you believe him!" All through the rest of
the episode, Kate laughs hysterically. BEEP! BEEP!

Billy's exploits into cable television began shortly
after he became Chump Tower's new VP. His first attempt
was far from successful. In fact, it was a dismal
failure. His first change to Chump's line up was the
addition of the Test Pattern Network, 24 hours a day of
the old 50's test pattern except the Indian's face was
replaced with that of Stafford Repp's. But that was just
the beginning. Next, he had the audacity to replace all
of Chump's programming with the Test Pattern Network. This
caused annoyed New Yorkers to storm Chump Towers. Billy
saved his miserable hide by using his excellent ninja
skills ( He liked to keep them to himself, but sometimes a
man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. ) to fend off the
attackers. Things returned to normal when he promised the
rioters to return all the programming to normal if they'd
return to their homes. BEEP! BEEP!

After he got the actual results from the people he
had annoyed, Billy decided to be more of a mogul, like Ted
Turner, than a trouble maker/riot inducer. Several of his
shows became instant classics, like "Odd." Among these








was the John Commode Show. It was advertised as a talk
show, but what it actually was was 30 minutes of a camera
close up of a toilet. The audience would wait for some
kind of response at first, but then would become terribly
annoyed. Eventually, they'd start heckling the bowl,
swearing, cursing, and what not, and then leaving the
studio in droves, still cursing. A few would remain in
their seats. This few and the few who had actually stayed
to watch the show at home made it a hit. BEEP! BEEP!

Another of Billy Peltzer's successes was "An Evening
at the Improve." This show was definitely a different
turn for television, but a change that the audience liked.
Its premise was that bad stand-up comedians would come on
and tell their jokes to jeers from the audience, hoping to
improve their act by finding out from the audience what
their good jokes were and copy them and what their awful
jokes were and eradicate them. "An Evening at the
Improve" was sponsored by Al-a-none, an alcohol
rehabilitation center. "I envy other kids. They don't
have a father, brother, great grandfather, aunt, nephew,
friend, roommate, pastor, social worker, or total stranger
who gets drunk every night. So that's why I turned to
Al-a-none. Yes, Al-a-none. Here at Al-a-none, we will
cure your loved ones of their addiction or kill them,
hence Al-a-none." BEEP! BEEP!

Then there's "Manchurian Gladiators." American
contestants are flown to Manchuria to enter various
physically grueling events, where the only purpose to
these events is to survive! These games were played to
the death. Those who did survive would win big bucks and
fabulous prizes! Such events included Cannonball and
Assault. These games were literally cannonballs and
assault. In Cannonball, the contestants had to endure
five minutes of cannon fodder. Assault was even more fun?
Gladiator and contestant have tennis rackets and lob a
live hand grenade back and forth. Whoever is left alive
after the explosion wins. If a contestant touches the
grenade with his hands or if he allows the grenade to
touch the ground he is disqualified. Disqualification
means death. If a Gladiator allows the same to happen, he
is given a bonus and the contestant is killed anyway.
BEEP! BEEP!

Billy scored a big coup when he bought up the rights
to Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer. He made it even more
popular in the ratings by changing one bit around. The
scene where Yukon Cornelius, Rudolph, and that strange elf
are trapped on an ice flow was the subject for this
mutilation. The part where Yukon throws his pick axe into








the air and, after it lands, he picks it up, sniffs it,
and tastes it for the presence of gold, says, "Nothing!"
becomes exactly the same except the axe lands in the
little elf's head and Yukon licks the blood off his ax.
BEEP! BEEP!

But, despite all of Billy's successes, not all of his
creations were hits. Some of them down right stank. The
Jocko Show was canceled after just twelve minutes into the
show. This pathetic attempt at a talk show was axed after
several MILLION viewers called in and complained because
they had become annoyed after being subject to twelve
solid minutes of nothing but, "OY!" The subsequent flop
of the Jocko Show resulted in the Adam West Show never
making it to the air. But, there is one shining, or
should we say, pulsating example of Billy Peltzer's
failures. That show was the Jm J. Bullock show. It was
supposed to be a family comedy about a black family being
slaves to Jm. Unfortunately, the thing that killed the
show was not in fact its pro slavery theme, but the fact
that too many viewers spent their time watching the show
trying to find the "I" in Jim. BEEP! BEEP!

Kate snuggled deeply into the couch cushions,
finished off her coffee, and bundled up beneath a nice,
warm layer of blankets. She cradled the remote control in
her hand much too erotically and changed the channel.
Chump's Sci-fi High was just starting. This program was
CCN's answer to the "creature feature" because it was in
fact a creature feature. Its host was the now old-beyond-
imagination Al Lewis, who played Grandpa on "The
Munsters." His old, squeaky banter was replaced by the
title screen of tonight's monster flick, "Attack Of The
The Eye Creatures." "Attack Of The The Eye Creatures" was
quickly replaced by Billy Peltzer's face. Kate sat up and
stared intently at the screen. Her expression changed
when she saw the Gremlins bouncing around the stage in the
background. "Kate, get down here!" Billy screamed into
the camera and dodged a Gremlin. "I'm gonna need all the
help I can get!"





















This is the end of Gremlins 2: Rewritten III \ Here They
Grow Again. You thought you'd never see it happen, but
Billy finally copped out. After defeating both the
Gremlins and the zombies by his lonesome, he has had to
finally... ASK FOR HELP! Gasp! Egad and oh God! Well, he
didn't exactly beat Mentos and the Critters alone, but he
didn't ask for their help. He would much rather you
forget about that incident. And it looks like Rand might
throw in $9.79 worth! Woooooo! Remember those pesky
Gremlins? Well, they mount an attack with a vengeance
next time in Gremlins 2: Rewritten IV \ No More Mister
Nice Guy. Same story; Different time!




Gremlins 2: Rewritten III \ Here They Grow Again @1993
( Yep. A new year, unfortunately. ) by David Minter.
Based on the movie Gremlins 2 @1990 by Warner Brothers
Pictures Incorporated, the concept of the Book and Record
Set @1984 by Buena Vista Records, and material from
Gremlins 2: Rewritten II \ The Legacy of Billy Peltzer
@1992 by David Minter and Gremlins 2: Rewritten \ Movin'
On Up to the East Side @1992 by David Minter.

Gremlins @1984, 1990 Warner Brothers Pictures
Incorporated.

Gremlins 2 @1990 Warner Brothers Pictures Incorporated.

Buena Vista Records is a subsidiary of Walt Disney.










 
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