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Idiotic Science - a perversely- amusing look at v
X-NEWS: camins rec.humor: 1321
Path: spang.Camosun.BC.CA!news.UVic.CA!ubc-cs!uw-beaver!cornell!rochester!udel!darwin.sura.net!mips!ol.mu.edu!umn.edu!lynx!vesta.unm.edu!skaterat
From: [email protected] (Skater At)
Newsgroups: rec.humor,alt.tasteless
Subject: Science Gone Insane
Summary: Actual experiments
Keywords: heh
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 23 Apr 92 03:48:27 GMT
Article-I.D.: lynx.1m7jbzf
Organization: University of New Mexico, Albuquerque
Lines: 41
Following is a list of actual experimental results of experiments that
someone for some weird reason thought were necessary to spend thousands
of dollars performing. (From pamphlet entitled 'Science Gone
Insane' distributed by United Action for Animals) Stupidity breeds
entertainment.
"Burning out certain areas of a female cat's brain reduces its sexual
activity whereas similar lesions have no effect on male sexual
behavior. Cost:$141,400
U of CA Davis
Both young and old rabbits with nylon threads sewn through their eyelids
and steel clips implanted in their skin respond to electric shock the
same way. They flinch.
Williams College, Mass.
Rats react the same way to both live cats and toys that resemble cats.
They arefrightened. (brilliant, eh?) U of Hawaii
Wild rhesus monkeys are more frightened of rubber hoses that look like
snakes than are laboratory-raised monkeys. U of Wisconsin
Rats forget how to perform simple tasks when repeatedly brain-shocked.
Case Western Reserve U.
Old cats dream less than young cats. Cost: $439,000 (!) Stanford U.
Different types of monkeys behave differently... Cost: $118,000 U of
Colorado,Boulder
Rabbit eyeball retraction is easily measured by pulling out the
cornea, replacing it with a glued on contact lens, and directly shocking
the optic nerve with electricity. Northwest U.
The amount of dreaming cats do while sleeping has no effect on how much
they eat. Cost: $235,119 Stanford U.
Dogs with narcolepsy-a disease causing uncontrollable sleeping-spend
more time drowsy and asleep than normal dogs. Cost: $847,000 Stanford
U. School of Medicine (Dictionary, anyone?)
Female rhesus monkeys sprayed with copulins - sex scents - have more
sexual encounters than unsprayed monkeys. Cost: $164,000 Emory U.
Morphine addicted vervet monkeys given naloxone show _more_ body shakes,
tremors, screaming, and vomiting than monkeys treated with natrexone
alone. (both causemorphine withdrawal). Cost: $225,000 Yale U.
And my personal favorite:
Although castration causes a significant decrease in the size of certain
glands in male kangaroo rats, ti does not affect their sunbathing
habits.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Central Missouri State U.
Plenty more (mostly gross mutilation), and all done in the 80s.
--Skaterat
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