|
|
 |
|
|
|
register |
bbs |
search |
rss |
faq |
about
|
|
|
meet up |
add to del.icio.us |
digg it
|
|
|
|
Funny one- liners
S_1: This is no ordinary person you are dealing with.
S_2: Hire a teenager, while they still know everything.
S_3: Reality is for people who can't handle drugs.
S_4: If you like sex and travel, take a FUCKIN' HIKE!
S_5: Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over!
S_6: The moral majority is full of shit!
S_7: If you think you feel good wait till you feel me!
S_8: I don't like your negative attitude, ASSHOLE!!!
S_9: If I wanted to hear from an asshole I would have farted!
S_10: When I die I hope they bury me upside-down so the whole world can kiss my
ASS!!!
S_11: I repeat myself when I'm Horny, I repeat myself when I'm Horny, I repeat
myself when I'm Horny!
S_12: Stupid people shouldn't BREED!!!
S_13: Petite but powerful.
S_14: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your
friends nose.
S_15: The Problem with todays men are they are so slow you wanna scream or so
fast you have to!
S_16: Oral Sex is a dark and lonely job, but someone's got to do it.
S_17: Women are expected to do twice as much as men; fortunately that's not
difficult!
S_18: What are you staring at DICKHEAD!
S_19: SHIT HAPPENS - and you're living proof.
S_20: Beyond bitch!!!
S_21: Think, and surprise us all.
S_22: It's not the size of the wand, its the magic that's in it.
S_23: Sometimes you just gotta say, "What the fuck!".
S_24: If you wanna complain about my attitude dial: 1-800-EAT-SHIT!
S_25: I'm not good with names, mind if I call you shithead?
S_26: If you fuck like you park, you'll never get in!
S_27: I'm in no shape to exercise.
S_28: Slightly burned out, but still smokin'!!!
S_29: Do me or don't do me.
S_30: Doobie or not doobie!
S_31: I'm about to develop an attitude problem, ASSHOLE!!!
S_32: Don't tease me just please me!
S_33: I used to jog, but the ice kept poppin' out of my glass.
S_34: We'll get along fine as soon as you realize I'm GOD!!!
S_35: Thanks for holding your breath while I smoke.
S_36: I'm not deaf, I'm ignoring you.
S_37: The surgeon general says always wear your rubber.
S_38: Some do, some don't, some will, some won't, I might!
S_39: I must be a mushroom; they keep me in the dark and feed me lots of
bullshit!
S_40: I don't give any shit, I don't take any shit, I'm not in the shit
business!
S_41: A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.
S_42: My favorite sport is sex, you don't need a suit.
S_43: A husband is living proof a wife can take a joke!
S_44: A clean house is a sign of a sick man!
S_45: P.B. Possible Bullshit
S_46: You interest me, vaguely.
S_47: Alright, you've seen California, now go home!!
S_48: Life's a bitch, then you marry one.
S_49: Are you stoned, or just stupid?
S_50: When I woke up this morning all I had left was one nerve, and now you're
getting on it!
S_51: ADIDAS - All Day I Dream About Sex
S_52: It's not the length, it's not the size, it's how many time you can make it
rise!
S_53: Sit on a happy face.
S_54: It's not how you pick your nose, it's where you put the boogers!
S_55: Don't touch because you can't afford me.
S_56: If you wanna get laid crawl up a chicken's ass and wait awhile!!!
S_57: Life is like a shit sandwich, the more bread you have the less shit you
have to take!
S_58: Sex is like snow, you never know how deep or how many inches you'll get!!!
S_59: I need more money and more power and less shit from you people.
S_60: I know jackshit!
S_61: I knew you in another life, you were a dipshit then too!!!!!
S_62: "A spike by any other name penetrates the same!"
S_63: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't roll your
friends into little green balls.
S_64: If you want to smoke let me help, I'll go get the flamethrower.
S_65: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't wipe your
friends on the bottom of your shoe.
|
|
|
To the best of our knowledge, the text on this page may be freely reproduced and distributed.
If you have any questions about this, please check out our Copyright Policy.
totse.com certificate signatures
|
|
|
About | Advertise | Bad Ideas | Community | Contact Us | Copyright Policy | Drugs | Ego | Erotica
FAQ | Fringe | Link to totse.com | Search | Society | Submissions | Technology
|
|
|
|
|
|
