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Quotable quotes

666 The Dead Zone 214-522-5321 300/1200/2400 666

Uploaded By: PAUL SMALLWOOD

"QUOTABLE QUOTES"
=================

***************************

"We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing,
while others judge us by what
we have already done"

Longfellow

-------------

"Never give advice in a crowd"

Arab Proverb

-------------

"A banker is a man who lends you an umbrella
when the weather is fair, and takes it away
from you when it rains"

............ Murphy's Laws ............

No good deed goes unpunished!

-------------

Leakproof seals - will!

-------------

Self-Starters - won't!

-------------

Interchangeable-Parts - won't!

-------------

There is always one more bug!

-------------

Don't mess with Mrs! Murphy!

-------------

90% of everything is crud!

-------------

If you're feeling good, don't worry,
you'll get over it!

------------------------

All warranties expire upon payment of invoice!

-------------

Never eat prunes when you are famished!

-------------

Friends come and go,
but enemies accumulate!

-------------

A short cut is the longest distance between two points!

-------------

No matter how long or hard you shop for an item,
after you've bought it, it will be
on sale somewhere cheaper!

-------------

The other line always moves faster!

-------------

Anything you try to fix will take longer and
cost more than you thought!

-------------

If you fool around with a thing for very long
you will screw it up!

-------------

A 300 dollar picture tube will protect
a 10 cent fuse by blowing first!

-------------

If it jams - force it!
If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway!

-------------

Any tool dropped while repairing a car will
roll underneath it to the exact center!

-------------

The repairman will never have seen
a problem quite like yours before!

-------------

When a problem with a broken appliance is demonstrated for the
repairman, it will work perfectly!

-------------

A pipe gives a wise man time to think and
a fool something to stick in his mouth!

-------------

When in doubt, mumble!
when in trouble, delegate!

-------------

A bird in hand is safer than one overhead!

-------------

Celibacy is not hereditary!

-------------

Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself!

-------------

Beauty is only skin deep; ugly goes to the bone!

-------------

Never play leapfrog with a unicorn!

-------------

If you think everything seems to be going well,
you obviously don't know what is going on!

-------------

If more than one person is responsible for a
miscalculation, no one will be at fault!

-------------

When in doubt, sound convincing!

-------------

Never argue with a fool -
people might not know the difference!

----------

"When I was younger, I could remember anything,
whether it had happened or not!"

----------

"An expert is a person who can
tell you more about something than you really care to know!"

----------

"Exhilaration is that feeling you get
just after a great idea hits you,
and just before you realize what's wrong with it!"

----------

"A foot is a device for
finding furniture in the dark!"

----------


 
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