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BLaH Magazine #21
? ??? ? ? ?
?? ?? ? ? ?
? ? ? ? ?
BLaH ? ? ? ??? ? ?
File ??? ? ?? ????? Written August 12th, 1992
#021 ? ?ig ?ong ??? ?nd ? ?airy
? ? ? ? ? ? ?
??? ???? ????? ?? ??
Presents
? ?? ?
"Very, Very Offended"
? by ?
Constantine
? ?? ?
To whom it may concern, not many of you because I am perfectly aware
how few of you really care about me, indeed, how many of you talk about me
behind my back and plot to take my life constantly, and that includes the
FBI agents who inserted a radio in my brain when I wasn't looking, but to
WHOM it may concern...
I'm rather ticked off.
I mean, I rush to BLaH WHQ, all ready and eager to get my latest
issue of BLaH and soak up some mystic wisdom from our leader, and what do
I get? A lengthy piece attacking the most sacred convention in bbsing,
the obnoxious tfile group. I am referring to issue #20, for those of you
who have your indexes handy.
This is the file where Guido, a man who I once saw as being up there
with Bob Dobbs and, yes, even Elvis, DARES to lash out at this honoured
tradition. Well, Mr. Sanchez, just a few words from an individual who
APPRECIATES what tfile groups do for our electronic community.
1: How can you be so cynical? Tfile groups that insist on repeated,
pointless referances to Neuromancer, cyberpunks and cyberspace are only
trying to prove one thing-- that most of them have really read an entire
book. Literary ambitions are important for tfile writers-- witness the
sad fate of the "Little Engine that was K00L" group.
2: VERY few tfile groups release things that are not theirs. Plagarism
is nearly non-existant in the bbs community, as everyone knows. The sad
truth of the matter is that all of those cyberpunk-novel quotes, misspelled
compilations of heavy metal and "Weird Al" lyrics, and the like, were all
originally written by the tfile groups and STOLEN! Strewth! William Gibson
and Pink Floyd have been doing it for years. What looks like plagarism to
the untrained eye is actually a clever attempt to reclaim the copyright.
3: The index-every-eight-issue concept is designed for the aid of tfile
collectors, who will go to unbelievable ends to keep their precious files
in order. Personally, I laminate mine and keep every file in a dust-free
mylar bag with an acid-proof cardboard backing.
4: Lie about their true headquarters? Shame on you! I don't see what's
so hard to believe about a bunch of European twelve-year-olds uploading
5k lyric transcriptions to tiny boards in Buttfuck, Ohio, do you?
5: Ragging on other tfile groups for no reason is very unprofessional.
Only snotnose punks like those assholes at MaDCaP do that.
6: Manipulating people just to get interviewed by Phrack is a waste of
energy. Manipulate Phrack to get interviewed by Phrack, manipulate people
to get MONEY.
7: There's only so much mileage you can get out of "fuck" and "shit". I
suggest using "pudlicking maggot scum" for emphasis in those sticky literary
corners.
But most of all, I am shocked by the contention that most tfile
writers just do so in order to put another nifty acronym at the end of
their names-- this is shameless cynicism at its height, no more and no
less. Until next we speak, I remain,
Constantine.
BLaH
GD
OTO
YARBLES
FTL-INC-NOT
Rotary Club
AA
AAA
ASPCA
BS
SOB
AADA
Coven of the Amber Sun
Elvis Anonymous
ETC
ETC
ETC...
Please address all fan mail and inquiries to me, care of Phrack
Magazine. [[email protected]] Thank you.
{---End of File, dammit!... Safe-T-Gnads v0.92?.7b says "5516 Bytes Total"--}
Uh huh... this file goes out to Guido Sanchez, who writes all of the shit from
the end of file to the propaganda line.
BLaH <sigh>ts are, as 'usual'..
?
Nun-Beaters Anonymous ? <708>251-5094 ? 110/16.8k
Carbon Nation ? <708>965-8965 ? 9600/16.8k <formerly Hell Bound, the
The Insane Asylum ? <305>927-3028 ? 2400/16.8k sysop can't make up his
The Realm Of Death ? <419>475-3089 ? 2400/16.8k damn mind>
?
{---Rebuttal Line. If you've got an opinion, write your own damn tfile------}
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